Monday, 28 June 2021
Excuses Context
When it comes to people, I care about, and there are many, I get protective and sometimes feel I need to make excuses or justify why they do things the way they do. Making those excuses are because not all the people I care about, care about social nuances.
Why does how someone behaves even matter? It depends upon the situation, mainly in a social family and friend situation, it’s not an issue. When you bring over a new friend, Mary (not name), for dinner, they’re shy and don’t offer to help with the dishes. Later, once your friend has gone home, you need to justify why they didn’t. By the way, this isn’t what happened today but something similar from my point of view.
In the example of not doing the dishes, when I went to Mary’s place for dinner, and I got up to do the words, they growled at me for even insinuating to do them. I was their guest, and it wasn’t right for the guest to do the dishes. Justifying Mary’s actions to my family as her being polite by not offering got a slew of mockery.
This kind of justification constantly brings forward an internal battle, and it depresses me. You try so hard to defend sometimes the indefensible, that it is exhausting. In the past, there have been one or two “boyfriends” where I’ve felt I had to justify their actions or inaction to others I love. To quote Kamal, a singer in the 70’s (?) “why are people so unkind?”. The question is certainly something many people have pondered.
Today's Cards
The Cards - Excuses Analysis
Carryover Cards
Only one card carried over from yesterday; Conditioning moved from Others’ Views to Feelings.
Cross Excuses
Totality is in the Now influenced by Ice-olation. Totality being the commitment, I throw myself into protecting Mary with excuses and Ice-olation in not knowing 100% whether I should be “a” defending her or “b” having a quiet talk to her about it”.
My Goal was Completion; I just want to end the justification cycle but don’t know how to change the situation.
In the Distant Past, I have been at ease with my Existence and connection to the world. More recently (Recent Past), Consciousness has crept in, and I’ve realised why making excuses is draining. I’m not true to myself.
Future Energy suggests a way of working out the impossible by having the Harmony card.
Base
Conditioning needs to break if my Feelings on today’s situation are correct. I do agree.
Others view me as being alone (Aloneness), in my view, maybe?
In the Hopes & Fears position, Ripeness says I am ready to wish (hope) I could move on from worrying about what others think. At the same time, I fear not worrying (fear) about what others believe will lead to a breakdown of intolerance.
Finally, Fighting is in the Outcome position and is my tenterhooks warning card to tell me to be extra careful when dealing with people, as I might be on the tired side and say something I might regret.
References
- Osho, Osho Zen Tarot – The Transcendental Game of Zen, St Martin’s Press, ISBN 0-312-11733-7
