9 April 2021
Vacation Context
My vacation today is different from the ones I took in my youth. I’m constantly reminiscing about my past, & I realise why they’ve changed.
There are always times when the family are visiting, in our household at least, where the exchange of information dries up, and conversation simmers to that comfortable, “can you make me a cuppa?” or “what do you feel like for dinner?”. Beyond that, everyone feels comfortable enough to catch up on a few winks by lying on beds. At other times, a neighbourhood walk is a pleasant way to spend an hour or two.
Community Gardens
Being classified as a medium-density housing area, the blocks in our neighbourhood can’t have extensive gardens. As a result, planting space for fruit and vegetable gardens is limited. Fortunately, the community has been provided with some land to grow vegetable gardens.
When my nephew visits, he loves visiting these gardens to see what’s growing. It also provides a teaching opportunity about the various fruits and vegetables grown in the gardens. Since my nephew visited last time, the gardens have received some love and care and have blossomed into something beautiful. The fresh food made us realise it was time to head back for lunch.
While everyone had their afternoon siesta, I ran around, getting the place back up to speed. Guests are great at assisting, but there are always little things that are not “guest” activities to fix which still need to get done. Different guests go nap at other times, but it still means you need to be awake to converse with the remaining guest/s who hadn’t gone to rest. Of course, this means as a host, you don’t get the nap.
The adults watched a Travel Guides (Australia) show; the adults went for a nap except me. Time, for me, was spent watching the nephew playing on the PlayStation. As you can imagine, there wasn’t much for me to do, but for some reason, the moment I went to leave, my nephew would have a question.
So, instead of leaving, I stayed and reflected. Part of me reflected on the difference between my younger self and my older self and how the youthful me soaked up every moment of recreation leave, while my older self wants to travel and spend a week at home before I go back to work.
Vacation Attitude of the Past
For instance, before travelling to Africa, I left work clothes in the work change rooms. The plan was for when the plane landed back home at Sydney airport at 6:30 am; I could go from the airport, get changed and be at work by 8:00 am. This strategy enabled me to use every moment of recreation leave, for productive recreational purposes, right up to the last second. Anything less at the time was considered (by my younger self) to be a waste of vacation time.
The response to any concerns other people had around wanting to come back a little early to sort themselves out was, everyday living would sort out clothes washing, dishes et cetera. I could catch up on sleep at the weekend. The body would reach its sleep equilibrium over the next couple of days. What I hadn’t allowed for was “jetlag”.
My mother called to say ‘hi’ at lunch, and my boss took the phone and, in a joking tone but completely serious, said, come and get her as soon as possible – she’s useless to me today. I started at the remark, but my boss ignored my protests and indignation. As the boss highlighted, I was suffering jet lag, and my focus was scattered. He was right, and he was also a fantastic boss! Smart and compassionate. I hated being beaten by jet lag!
Why My Vacation Changed
Ahhh…. How smug karma must feel today. As the dawning of understanding about other people’s choices in the past sinks in every time, I add additional days to my vacation to be at home. My, my how perspective changes.
In defence of my younger self, she did not have a home loan, pets, partner or anywhere near the myriad of “other” obligations which the older self now needs to maintain. She had a simple life, living in a one-bedroom unit that only required keeping clean and paying the rent. Mobile phones didn’t exist yet, and to make a phone call, you had to go to the phone box. Younger me also had a good savings plan, didn’t have to worry about a car loan, just registration and car insurance. All up, without all the grown-up overheads, it was easy to show up at work, earn money, and go on vacation.
Another thing my younger self didn’t understand was the sooner you went back to work after a vacation, the sooner the break became buried under daily life. So now I take a few days to savour the trip before heading back into the fray.
Today's Cards
The Cards - Analysis
Carryover Cards
Only one card carried over from yesterday; Past Lives moved from Hopes & Fears to Goal.
Cross
In the Now position is Rebirth, influenced by the card of Comparison. The Goal today was Past Lives.
There was no conscious choice to prompt the thoughts of travels in the past, yet I was aware I wanted to write about it today somehow. I think this so many times on so many days, and it never comes to fruition – not about this topic, just about any topic in general. It doesn’t always come to fruition because the writing and the day can turn out differently from what I expect and write about them instead.
The Rebirth is possibly me thinking about past travel. The Comparison’s influence is evident in how I managed travel time in vacations past instead of how I look at travel time today. Past Lives is also apparent in that I’m comparing a “past life” from this current day to a travel style that seems to have happened several lifetimes ago.
In the Distant Past, I was fully aware, Consciousness, of the overarching travel arrangements. Today I’m a little more relaxed with funding and scheduling vacations.
In the Recent Past, the Adventure card indicates that I still enjoy my adventures of self-discovery. However, if vacations today were modelled on the same format as previously, the discovery of new experiences at the time wouldn’t have occurred.
After all, your life is a Moment to Moment discovery 😁 as displayed in the Future Energy card echoing and continuing the Adventure card.
Base
In the Feelings or Immediate Future position is the Maturity card. The Maturity card is about understanding growth and how you got to where you are. So it makes sense that since the early years, I’ve become more knowledgeable.
Others’ Views are that of Completion. My Completion is putting all the “pieces” together for myself. I have resolved the longing to travel like I once did to accept the way I like to vacation.
Hopes & Fears has the card of Celebration. Celebration is an excellent time to take a vacation. I hope that the next break can encompass some adventure like in the past; the corresponding fear is that due to COVID, we will be unable to fulfil the desired vacation.
Letting Go in the Outcome position seems to be unrelated to the other cards. However, it could mean recognising vacations are different, and it’s time to let go of the longing to do things the way I used to do them, thus, Letting Go.
References
Osho, Osho Zen Tarot – The Transcendental Game of Zen, St Martin’s Press, ISBN 0-312-11733-7
