Day 010 – Suppression and The Rebel

10 January 2021

Celtic Cross Layout of daily cards.1 is Now, card is Suppression. 2 is Influence, card is Beyond Illusion. 3 is Goal, card is The Dream. 4 is Distant Past, card is Consciousness. 5 is Recent Past, card is Projections. 6 is Future Energy, card is The Master. 7 is Feelings, card is The Rebel. 8 is Others’ views, card is Schizophrenia. 9 is Hopes & Fears, card is Comparison. 10 is Outcome, card is Possibilities.

Today's Cards

Tabled list:position number,description,and daily card.1 is Now, card is Suppression. 2 is Influence, card is Beyond Illusion. 3 is Goal, card is The Dream. 4 is Distant Past, card is Consciousness. 5 is Recent Past, card is Projections. 6 is Future Energy, card is The Master. 7 is Feelings, card is The Rebel. 8 is Others’ views, card is Schizophrenia. 9 is Hopes & Fears, card is Comparison. 10 is Outcome, card is Possibilities. Shuffle Method used was Washing Machine.

Context

Welcome to day 10! I’m excited to be moving into double digits.  Wishing desperately that I had not started publishing without a buffer.  On the upside you’re getting everything as soon as the day has happened with no delay.

My husband commented to me on yesterday’s posts about my feelings of being guilty about editors.  He quite nicely mentioned that it’s an editor’s job to be a catalyst for the work submitted to them without leaving themselves in the work.  While I understood this conceptually, describing like this helped me visualise their role better.  What an amazing profession.  Yet another profession of unsung heroes. 

However, I know myself enough that if I did not take a break my enthusiasm would wane.  A break I took because the cats don’t do housework and while husband does do housework, it’s not fair to have him do it all on what is also his day off.  

Today is the second day of Greater Brisbane Lockdown with only essential movement allowed.  Masks even need to be worn in the car should you need to go to the shops; which is something we did do today.

You see I’m an ovo-lacto vegetarian and my husband is your standard omnivore with a fondness for meaty foods.  When lockdown was announced on Friday he rang me to get some cold meats for him and some chicken strips so he could have dinners over the next couple of nights.

When I went to the shops it was busy and all I managed to get him was one small meat lovers pizza and some ham. 

Not having eaten or shopped for meat in twenty-seven years meant that I lacked the expertise to gauge how much meat might be required on a sandwich.  Husband mentioned to his work colleagues after he hung up that he might wind up with a kilo or 100g. 

So, I underestimated the quantity for three days and got flustered and forgot to get chicken strips :(.  Eh… going vegetarian would be so bad for a day … would it?

Apparently, it was.  We decided to get exercise in with the shopping by walking to the shops.  

Today also held moments of gardening and cleaning out the small water feature because the pump had died.

How much more exciting did you expect the day to get while we’re in lockdown? :).

Maybe the cards will add some excitement … let’s take a look.

The Cards

First card in the Now is Suppression.  The disadvantage of doing your own cards is that quite often when you come across a card like Suppression you’re exactly sure what you could be suppressing.  Let’s just say I was trying to keep away from the website for my own good – or was it?  An external reader may have been able to identify what exactly it was that I was trying to suppress. 

The second card in the Influence position is Beyond Illusion.  Because position one had Suppression I am going to say that the chrysalis may reach a stage of taking a moment before trying again.  Much as the birthing process the mother may wish to take a moment before needing to push again.  

So too was today, that rest day before a rededication to the task at hand.  The slowing or taking a breather is what Beyond Illusion‘s influence appears to be, if I were to make it work without referring to the book.

Third card in the Goal position is The Dream.  I’m never quite sure of what to make of The Dream card in any position but when it appears in the Goal position and I know what The Dream means.  How can I be wishing for a Goal of romantic ideals or notions when they are unrealistic?  Maybe it’s because it is a romantic notion I fall for it.  

I’m going to put this out there, not doing a lot in a day means that I need to hone in on minor things because that’s all there is to relate it to.  At this point, I cannot relate this card to anything specific without clutching at straws.  Maybe it’s just the everyday-ness that’s the dream or that my life is less interesting that I thought?  

Distant Past position has Consciousness.  It looks like Consciousness has moved from being in the Outcome position on Day 007 to now being in the Distant Past – exciting!  My expectation is that either Outcomes, Future Energy or cards in the Feelings cards might appear in the Distant Past.  

Consciousness represents clarity of thought that led to the Now card of Suppression.  Confusing?

Not really, I awakened my enthusiasm for the website and was ploughing ahead, when today I decided to suppress that enthusiasm because I wanted to do what I used to do on weekends. 

It’s bit of nostalgia or wanting to be able to do both.  Aha! … that’s where the The Dream card fits as a Goal.  I know very well that I cannot go back – not least for a year – which is what the ‘experiment’ of Tarot Days was set up to do.     

The Recent Past position has Projections.  In line with The Dream is ProjectionsProjections is about because I link things a certain way that the person I am talking to also links it the same way; or at least I that’s what I believe is happening.  This might be the vegetarian thing.  It really couldn’t be all bad being a vegetarian for one day, could it?  Really?  

Future Energy is The Master card and looking ahead a little with position seven having The Rebel card, these two cards are reflecting similar concepts.  Both are not bound by everyday conditioning and social constructs. 

The difference between them is that The Rebel does the breaking in going his own way and The Master exists outside of the constructs themselves.  In my case, it might just be that I’m oblivious to the constructs.  

The Master, to me, is like how the journey to enlightenment was described to me: “when you first start your journey a mountain is just a mountain, as you grow in awareness you see that the mountain is so much more than a mountain, when you reach enlightenment a mountain is just a mountain”. 

Apart from the obvious that the enlightenment is also about the journey.  Awareness of the mountain’s makeup: the rocks, grass, goats, critters, flowers, seeds, the dead flora and fauna, the new growth and the streams area a crucial part of appreciating the mountain as a mountain at enlightenment.

When The Master enters the layout, especially in the Future Energy spot it means that I will come back to a position I once held but with a better non-judgemental appreciation.

The Rebel card in position seven means that I will most likely view things I once snubbed in a new light but not in the same way that I used to.  Let me explain … in my teens in order to show that I wasn’t influenced by a movies “hype” I deliberately didn’t go and see it.  This meant though that I was missing out on great movies. 

After a while I decided that being with friends was more important to me than a movie’s hype. I also realised that sometimes because you follow doesn’t mean you are a sheep.  My rebellion, although stupid, eventually led me to reassess the things I found important.   

Other People’s Views card is Schizophrenia.  Now other people are seeing me between a rock and a hard place.  My husband is my only feedback loop and we didn’t discuss it 🙂 – especially since he’s asleep while I’m writing this post. 

At a guess, it could be the desire for a day off and knowing that I’m not able to get a buffer.  He might just feel sorry for me.  I’m okay with that.

Hopes & Fears position has Comparison.  Once again the Comparison card shows up in the Hopes and Fears position.  And I do have a pesky habit of comparing myself against people who I consider dynamic. 

My neighbour, for instance, who in between rain bursts raced out and cut the lawn while I sat playing Words with Friends or doing jigsaw puzzles.

The Outcome position has Possibilities card yet again. That’s six times in ten days.  It’s nice to have possibilities showing up all over the place. 

Because of that I thought it was time I actually opened the book to see what it meant according to Osho in case it entailed more that the word implies.  But, alas, it is in seeing possibilities around me and what is possible. 

The book did add a nice little note indicating that help in the form that I need will assist.  How lovely is that?!

Have a big virtual embrace from me. Until tomorrow ….  

Day 009 – The Compassion of Understanding

9 January 2021

Celtic Cross Layout of daily cards.1 is Now, card is Ripeness.2 is Influence, card is Schizophrenia.3 is Goal, card is Friendliness.4 is Distant Past, card is Celebration.5 is Recent Past, card is Trust.6 is Future Energy, card is Going with the Flow.7 is Feelings, card is Silence.8 is Others’ views, card is Creativity.9 is Hopes & Fears, card is Possibilities.10 is Outcome, card is Understanding.

Today's Cards

Tabled list:position number,description,and daily card.1 is Now, card is Ripeness.2 is Influence, card is Schizophrenia.3 is Goal, card is Friendliness.4 is Distant Past, card is Celebration.5 is Recent Past, card is Trust.6 is Future Energy, card is Going with the Flow.7 is Feelings, card is Silence.8 is Others’ views, card is Creativity.9 is Hopes & Fears, card is Possibilities.10 is Outcome, card is Understanding.Shuffle Method used was Washing Machine.

Context

Welcome to day 9!

Today was the first day of lockdown for the Greater Brisbane area.  This means that excitement needed to be found around the home.  It also meant that my interstate family who usually have trouble catching up with me on a weekend knew exactly where to find me.  

The change in weather and our presence at home has meant that the slave drivers (our cats) have their slaves easily to hand.  On at least four occasions my masters has me pinned to the seat preventing me from doing any housework.  It meant, of course, that left my husband free to bring me food and drink until they deigned to let me off the seat.  It didn’t all go my way, the reverse was true when he was pinned down.

You may ask, how did these felines (fiends) manage to get the upper hand on two strong capable human beings?  Let me respond with my own question, “have you ever been purred at or on?”.  It’s incredibly difficult to resist, just like a puppy that looks up at you with sweet brown eyes wanting a piece of that chicken stuff you have on your plate.   

Alternately, we might just be suckers. 

Before I go any further, I should categorically state that I love my family and friends and do not mind being contacted by them whatever the time or the cause.  Those that know me, know that when I write about “escaping them” it is only because I know they know I’m not serious.  In fact, I am honoured to have them in my life.   

Now back to the jesting :).

The excuses I proffered were like, washing my hair at 2:00pm, brushing my teeth, filing my fingernails did not pass for suitable “doing things” to avoid a Zoom chat.  I did manage to forestall the meeting by claiming that one of our masters, Valentine, was on my lap. Which was apparently plausible – he’s gotten to them too!. Waylaid by master Valentine, hair brushing had to take a backseat.  The Zoom chat clearly demonstrated that I had not brushed my hair for days!

On the upside, I got some gardening done even if it was raining. 

That said, let’s see how interesting the cards make lockdown sound 🙂

The Cards

First card is Ripeness in the Now position. As the name implies I am ready for the next step and that some degree of maturity has been reached.  Indeed, I believe there has been but for most of the day I was stalling on progressing.  Fortunately, I had already committed to deliver a document for editing.

Second card in the Influence position is Schizophrenia. Schizophrenia being that rock and hard place decision making or at the very least being in two minds about doing or not doing something is a blocker card.  The rock was commitments to my family and the hard place was the commitment to send something through for editing in the morning.  Both happened just the timing changed from what was originally planned.

The third position or Goal position has the Friendliness card.  This is just having a good feeling of solidarity with my fellow humans being in lockdown together.  Or could it be that I would like the website to come across as friendly?

Distant Past card is Celebration.  The card of Celebration is moving in a predictable arc.  What this technically means is that the moment of Celebration has left an imprint from which future decisions has been built off.  This could be that I had some success with asking for help instead of trying to go it alone.  The best part about it was that I was humbled and pleased by the positive response. 

Recent Past card is Trust.  The part of me that was reluctant to ask for help, apart from not wanting to oblige my friends to help, was that I get a bit scared having an editor look at my stuff.  This is for two reasons: one is that I’m scared of the judgement on the poor grammar and two is that if the editor finds too much to change that it reinforces that I’m not very good at it. 

Okay there’s a third reason, if the editor does their job well, it sounds as if I could have written it and therefore on some part robs the editor a little of their skill – which what I really don’t want to do.  

That then brings us to what Trust is all about – letting go and trusting the people and the process without it there’s no growth.

Fittingly, the Future Energy position shows the card of Going with the Flow.  The image is of a person floating naked on their back in a relaxed state, letting the water/ river take its body wherever it will. 

This is “going with the flow”.  It’s not fighting where you’re going. Not fighting the circumstances of what you’re in. It’s simply surrendering and accepting without fear.  Note, this is not being blindly led, the figure is not being forced. 

Going with the Flow follows on from the Trust and Ripeness cards to demonstrate that it is certainly time to put documentation out there to be tweaked.  

My Feelings on the issue card is Silence. As mentioned yesterday when Silence appeared as a Goal of listening to an inner quieted mind.  My feelings on being ready (Ripeness) are very closely aligned to Going with the Flow.  I am at peace with the actions I have taken and am awaiting feedback, whether that be good or bad from an ego perspective.

The Other People’s Views spot has the Creativity card. The Creativity card is like the card of pregnancy it is something that comes from you but does not belong to you.  Creativity can be all absorbing for a while and buoys enthusiasm. 

Am guessing that family and friends can see that in me at the moment.  Every second paragraph rolls back to my website.  I pity them over the next year *smile*. 

The Hopes and Fears card is Possibilities and out of nine days it has shown up five times regardless of the shuffle method.  The last three days I have been using the “washing machine method”. The method entails laying the cards on a flat surface and then simply swirling the cards around clockwise and counter-clockwise to ensure they are well and truly shuffled.

So Possibilities is what I hope for, in that I would like things to progress and open up for me.  At some point, I will need to get the other things that make up a business website happening.  Oh, you know little things like, “comments”, “like” and “subscribe” options at the bottom of posts.  That will then trigger another learning curve – scary!

The Outcome position has the card of Understanding.  Many years ago I had a dream of being jailed.  The jail didn’t have doors or a warder to attend it.  The jail was like one of those “honesty boxes” you see by the side of the road situation next to random fruits or vegetables.  

Unsure of my crime, I sensed in the dream that it couldn’t have been serious if there were no bars, doors or guards. Not even any other inmates.  After some time I realised I could leave whenever I wanted.  There was no-one there to stop me but me.  But I was cautious about leaving nonetheless.

It was such a vivid dream.  Analysing my own dream on waking made me understand that sometimes I punish myself for stuff that no-one else would even think was even punishable.  It was stuff that if it was someone else I wouldn’t punish them for it.  

So, I had to pretend I was someone else and treat myself like I would them.  Usually someone I loved and/ or cared about.   

This is what the Understanding card is about.  It is about realising that constraints that were in place by me on me were really of my own doing.  Understanding in the Outcome position might simply mean that I am ripe for this type of realisation or that the indecision found in Schizophrenia and the fears in represented by Possibilities are distorted by an inner unfair and harsher perspective.

With love, Michaela

Day 008 – Doing things Properly

8 January 2021

Celtic Cross Layout of daily cards.1 is Now, card is Friendliness.2 is Influence, card is Totality.3 is Goal, card is Silence.4 is Distant Past, card is Postponement.5 is Recent Past, card is Celebration.6 is Future Energy, card is Thunderbolt.7 is Feelings, card is The Creator.8 is Others’ views, card is Past Lives.9 is Hopes & Fears, card is Laziness.10 is Outcome, card is Morality.

Today's Cards

Tabled list:position number, description, and daily card.1 is Now, card is Friendliness.2 is Influence, card is Totality.3 is Goal, card is Silence.4 is Distant Past, card is Postponement.5 is Recent Past, card is Celebration.6 is Future Energy, card is Thunderbolt.7 is Feelings, card is The Creator.8 is Others’ views, card is Past Lives.9 is Hopes & Fears, card is Laziness.10 is Outcome, card is Morality.Shuffle Method used was Washing Machine.

Context

This morning I woke up, shuffled the cards laid them out and noticed that Thunderbolt appeared in the deck.  Last time Thunderbolt graced my cards while I was on vacation I got back to work and discovered that my job had changed.  

It meant that I was going to move physically but more importantly the result of the move and change of job would mean a complete stocktake of my life.  Unfortunately, there was no extra money.  The change prompted doubts, suspicion, and flattery all mingled in together.

You see, Thunderbolt is about a dramatic shift in the physical surroundings – that’s at least how I’ve always interpreted the card of The Tower – in some other decks this card is called the Tower.  The imagery or how it is depicted is similar too.

As you can imagine, I got nervous.  Without really focussing on the other cards and not wanting to until the day passed so I could form a retroactive perspective on events.  

It turns out the change to my physical surroundings was announced on the news and to me when my mother and husband rang to advise me of the Premier’s decision. 

Yep.  It’s the greater Brisbane area of Queensland, Australia.  We were going into level 4 lock down as of 6:00pm for three days.  Thunderbolt  card now makes complete sense sitting in the Future Energy position.  

It also makes sense for yesterday’s Change card .  And although I refer to the position as the Feelings position, the position has typically also covered on upcoming feelings.  The timeframe I’ve read this at is within the next one to seven days.  The duality of meaning was there yesterday, I just hadn’t had my precognition turned on :).

Now you have context, let’s see what the other cards had to say.

The Cards

Position one had Friendliness.  The night before I talked with my husband about getting the dinners for the weekends.  We had used all the HelloFresh meal kits for the week and decided that we needed a few things from the supermarket.  

Not thinking the shops would get too busy for a three day lockdown I didn’t rush.  But I did decide to go earlier rather than later so I could get back to doing things for the website. Kind of like, the sooner I go the sooner I’ll get back.

Glad I did, the line at the local supermarket was already quite long 200 metres, maybe.  Anyway, in line which was the Now position when I did the cards this morning.  While waiting there was a bit of solidarity.  If you like, a Friendliness.   

Totality as the Influencer in this circumstance meant that I need to commit totally to the shopping.  But there is the subtle hint at the total lockdown to come.  The nice part of going into lockdown was all the support from family and friends we received. Very touching.

Silence in the Goal position can be read as literal or figurative. The Osho book refers to Silence as a quietening of the mind.  For me, it’s bliss. A time to turn inward.  It is like a sense of being one with the universe.      

The Distant Past has Postponement. So, there were certain things I was postponing yesterday; going to the shops, contacting the web developer and approaching a friend to help me out with some editing.  Most of which I had dealt with.

Naturally, dealing with things that I’ve stupidly been postponing brought with it the cause for Celebration.  And look at that, the Celebration card is in the Recent Past position.  What else can really be said?  Postponement overcome created the Friendliness I felt with my fellow line-upperers (yes, I know that’s not a word) which in turn is cause for Celebration.  

Now, how does all this fit in with the Future energy position of Thunderbolt.  Remember that the Thunderbolt card is about the change to physical circumstances and the trigger for a reassessment of one’s situation.  Just because I know its coming doesn’t mean I’ve lived it :).

I fully expect that the Future energy card will last the three days.  It will be interesting to see if Thunderbolt appears at all.  Personally, I’d be surprised if it did since it’s the future position.

The Feelings position has The CreatorThe Creator is about working on oneself to improve oneself.  So, the card and position implies that I will be working on myself creatively.  

On the other hand, I have found that this card can have the other kind of creator that works with nurturing something beautiful and physical into being.  There is a plan to put together a media gallery tomorrow.  We’ll see if I do any deep diving on myself.

Others’ views is Past Lives.  Not quite sure how to interpret the Others’ views position when I’m reading for myself.  It’s much easier reading this position for others.  I find there’s more of a distorted view on anything I think other people might be thinking – as good a guess as it can sometimes be.  

No! In the beginning I said that when I view Past Lives it is for this life time only.  The cards or I know this.  So, this is why it has come up to read with that interpretation.  Others’ views then means that I am bringing back what I used to do.  That’s for those that have known me for some time, that is.  Makes sense.  There’s a lot of my Past Lives cropping up at the moment. 

This next card in the next position does not come as a surprise to me.  Laziness is one of my greatest Hopes & Fears. Oh! To fully enjoy the contentment of being able to sit back and not worry about things slipping.  

On a more serious note, I go into overdrive whenever Laziness crops up in a reading.  There’s a make sure that I’m kicking myself off the lounge and cleaning, reading, typing, creating or just doing something.  Then the fear sneaks in that I will miss something. Especially the thing the card is actually referring to, which is probably what I’m lazily avoiding because I’ve “been there done that”.   

The title of this post is “Doing thing Properly” and the card of Morality’s appearance in the Outcome position had me pursing my lips.  Had this post been written before the day had transpired the “irkiness” I felt at seeing it would have come through.

However, here is a situation where the card makes complete sense. The Morality card symbolises societal conditioning and conforming to expectations.  Words that usually arouse the prickliness in me and whispers for me to see if the boundaries are spongy or breakable :).  

It took quite a bit of self-discipline to quell that rebellious reaction.  Luckily, I’ve learnt not simply to blindly rebel to something when someone says it’s moral and assess whether is has validity for me.  Of course, in this case it completely makes sense to follow the “right thing”.

Yet the COVID lockdown announcement encourages people to conform to do things properly – social distance, wash hands, wear a mask.  Ironically, by conforming and doing these things you are actually heroic.  You are contributing to stopping the spread of the virus and potentially saving lives.   All by doing things properly.

Morality from Osho’s intent, is about being sequacious (thank you Susie Dent – UK Countdown for the word of the day) and unthinking.  It’s all about revalidating what the right thing to do is.  From a Chinese proverb, “he who believes too long in something soon becomes wrong”.  

It’s the “half life of facts”, if you don’t keep renewing the data you have it will become outdated.  Basic mathematics is used daily and is tested for validity and is therefore kept up-to-date’ so too should morality be tested to retain validity. 

Day 007 – Times are a-Changing

7 January 2021

Possibilities, Schizophrenia, No-thingness, Comparison, Turning In, Playfulness, Change, New Vision, Participation, Consciousness

Today's Cards

Tabled list:position number,description,and daily card.1 is Now, card is Possibilities.2 is Influence, card is Schizophrenia.3 is Goal, card is Nothingness.4 is Distant Past, card is Comparison.5 is Recent Past, card is Turning In.6 is Future Energy, card is Playfulness.7 is Feelings, card is Change.8 is Others’ views, card is New Vision.9 is Hopes & Fears, card is Participation.10 is Outcome, card is Consciousness.Shuffle Method used was Washing Machine.

Context

Well, my day started later than planned.  I have side-tracked A LOT! Equipment I needed, lighting specifically, to finish some of the work I had planned to do for the website, wasn’t available in the stores I visited. I may need to rethink the day’s tactics because it seems times are changing throughout the day.  Not having what I needed meaning my day was a little frustrating, and then I remembered I was on vacation – yay!

Unfortunately, I did some doom-scrolling today.  For those unaware of what doom-scrolling is, it is the act of clicking on one fearful headlined article to the next.  Doom-scrolling operates on your fears and slight morbidity for you to keep scrolling.  You go from one morbid or frightening item to the next. 

At the moment, it’s mainly the feeds trending on Twitter re the US Presidential election status in the United States.  I’m disappointed that a dynamic individual such as Trump hadn’t behaved with dignity like past presidents when he knew that times are a-changing.  Even when the president runners-up of the past felt robbed, they acted with more dignity! 

Win-Lose when times are a-changing

In his last four years, Trump has failed to portray anything but an “us versus them” attitude, alternatively the school of win-lose instead of the business term of win-win.  When you’re running a country, shouldn’t the aim be for a win-win (win for the country is a win for you)?  Win-lose means that for one party to win, the other party has to lose.  The UK Prime Minister, Mr Boris Johnson, has shown personal growth (movie terms his character has had a character arch) in recent times.

The win-lose concept is appropriate on a sports field; it should not apply once you’ve already won in politics.  When Trump won the 2016 election, his attitude should have gone from one of win-lose to win-win.  Remembering politicians are responsible for the people who elected them and those who didn’t – that’s democracy. It might help to remember, “a rising tide lifts all boats”. 

Anyway, I digress.   By the way, speaking of “times are a-changing”, I mixed things up a bit by changing the shuffling method.  Today, I put the deck on a flat surface and swished them around as a washing machine does. Let’s see what the cards have to say.

The Cards

Cross - the first three

Once again, the day started with Possibilities in the Now.  I wonder whether this is how my day begins when I have great aspirations?  As we know, there were things I wanted to do, mainly get lighting, so let’s go with that.

This week’s popular card is Schizophrenia, and my Influencer appears to be that old ‘rock and a hard place’ thing preventing movement for fear of everything collapsing.  The very nature of the card, Schizophrenia, tells us that it’s a blocking card.

The block could very well be the lack of being able to purchase the piece of lighting equipment I wished to use today.  The company had sold out of the product I wanted.  There were expensive versions available.  However, I’m not sure how much I am going to use this device or not.  Nor do I know if it’s going to be effective.

Part of me then thought if I got a cheap one, it wouldn’t work well, and it wouldn’t be effective anyway.  Why isn’t this card called confusion?  So, it looks like I discovered my rock (wait for the expensive one) and a hard place (go cheap and hope it works) – you can pick which is which.  In the end, I decided that I could work without either and simply make do with what I had at home.  Only to discover that what I wanted to do wouldn’t have worked anyway!

It’s incredible that the Goal position has the card of No-thingness – or as I like to refer to it as ‘potential’.  Today, however, I think “nothing-ness” is more appropriate.  It felt like I had not accomplished anything.  I wanted a blank slate.  Aha!  I remember I sent off payment to get my logo changed.  There’s potential to get something moving!  My goal lives!!!

Times are a-changing from Distant Past to Future Energy

The Distant Past card of Comparison had me stumped.  Although, I did pleasantly note that it had moved to this position.  Like a big, “phew”!  However, it just dawned on me that I was frustrated not getting through my list of to-dos because of the success of the other day. It all went so easy.  Perhaps refocussing on a vacation day helped me not be so hard on myself.

As for the Recent Past position, the card of Turning In makes complete sense.  Yesterday, I recommenced meditating.  Meditating is a phase I go through.  For ages, it worried me thinking that I would lose the discipline or the desire to meditate.

I am trying to turn it into a habit.  But it’s a part of me.  I’ve been doing it, and I enjoy meditating – even if it gets painful. I’m always glad I’ve taken the time to meditate, forced, disciplined or otherwise.

Another form of turning in for me is to do yoga.  I was still a bit sore from the other day’s reacquaintance with the practice – ouch!

Future energy position has the card of Playfulness. Apart from annoying the dishwasher today, there wasn’t a lot of Playfulness in the day.  There was dragging our second cat Valentine around on the bedside mat for a few twirls just to try and upset him.  Sadly, that failed. He just purred happily and lay flat on his back for a pat.  Maybe it’s yet to come :).

Base

The Feelings position regarding my situation of Possibilities not going to plan was/is Change. Osho Zen, on the metaphysical level, speaks of the cycles of highs and lows.  The patterns of joy and sorrow.  The Change card is about recognising the pattern and breaking it.  

It can also mean that there is Change afoot.  Some inner change will require assessment and a shift in perspective.  

Or it may be at that moment when I discovered that Comparison between my productive day and expecting that today wasn’t going to be like that.  There was the potential, as I had said above, that it was frustrating.  Indeed, there were elements, if I resigned myself to treat the day as a vacation day instead of wallowing in the frustration, the pattern would break.

The position of Other People’s Views holds the card of New Vision. The New Vision view means other people see me as connecting with something that is “me”.  Let’s face it, the only person at this stage I can gauge that off is my husband.  That’s probably following yesterday’s Dobby story.  My husband has also seen the other stuff I’ve been working on, which may also present that impression.

Oh, the Hopes and Fears position is Participation. Participation in this spot could have so many meanings now, and to some extent, they are probably all relevant.  However, to keep this concise.

I would love to get some participation going with a feedback loop and the “like, subscribe, notification” kind of thing happening, apart from the fact that I would need to find an intelligent developer person to help me out with that.  It scares me too.  It’s kind of when this s*it gets real!

Predicted Outcome

The Outcome position is Consciousness. The card is about having a crystal clear and focussed mind and not having it flicker from place to place like an undisciplined inner child.

Consciousness is a lovely card to end on, particularly around mental clarity.  There is undoubtedly some clarity around what I want to accomplish.  Being unable to get the equipment I thought I wanted has made me think of alternatives that might work, maybe even better in the short term.

I plan to put up a page regarding the card layout tomorrow.  I haven’t decided whether I will post off the page to an editor to fix up or whether I will just subject you to it.  Let’s just see what happens.

Day 006 – Butterflying!

6 January 2021

Celtic Cross Layout of daily cards.1 is Now, card is Beyond Illusion.2 is Influence, card is Courage.3 is Goal, card is Harmony.4 is Distant Past, card is Rebirth.5 is Recent Past, card is Integration.6 is Future Energy, card is Sharing.7 is Feelings, card is Playfulness.8 is Others’ views, card is Experiencing.9 is Hopes & Fears, card is Patience.10 is Outcome, card is Breakthrough.

Today's Cards

Tabled list position number, description and daily card:1 is Now,Beyond Illusion.2 is Influence,Courage.3 is Goal,Harmony.4 is Distant Past,Rebirth.5 is Recent Past,Integration.6 is Future Energy,Sharing.7 is Feelings,Playfulness.8 is Others’ views,Experiencing.9 is Hopes & Fears,Patience.10 is Outcome,Breakthrough.

Butterflying Context

Today’s blog is about Dobby the cat, me, a spider and the word butterflying.   And it’s about transforming Mikki, the logo figure.

 

I know butterflying can mean splitting a piece of fish or meat in two to create a butterfly shape.  However, it has always sounded like it should represent the act of becoming a butterfly to me.  For the website, it’s appropriate as a metaphor for opening up my insides and sharing them, in a sense butterflying my soul.  Hence, the usage of the term butterflying.

 

Yesterday’s reading ended with Schizophrenia or about being caught between a rock and a hard place, with me thinking nothing else but sleep could happen before I went to bed.  How wrong I was! 

The Spider and Me

As I prepared for bed, I spotted a massive huntsman spider on the ceiling above the bedroom door.  You can link to the image about the size is in this article.   Normally, I would call my husband to relocate the spider down to the creek.  However, when I was single, I used to just leave it, but it was right ABOVE THE BEDROOM DOOR!  And like in the article mentioned above, they’re safe, but they do jump at you if you want to get into an argument about ceiling space. 

 

My hard place was I wanted to go to bed and didn’t want to open the door because he might go into the bedroom and wake my husband.  It’s also been a few years since I had slept with a spider in the room.  I’d be a hypocrite to say I don’t kill spiders, I just don’t kill ones this size, and besides, it’s not lethal.  Just scary.

 

The rock was the spider and its location.  I did not want to be jumped by the spider!  So, I took a deep breath and let go of going to bed just at that moment and let go of trying to capture the spider but simply decided to wait until it moved – that elusive third option. 

 

It moved.  Over the dining table, then over the glass table where our small tabletop Christmas tree sat.  At the base of the tree’s base were Christmas cards, family photos, unwrapped presents and a bowl where my husband kept his wallet at night.  Basically, not gettable, although I got the back scratcher and flung a few cards off the table.

The Spider and the Cat

One of our cats (Dobby, the ginger) showed up and thought he would be my rescuer.  The cat would do what it would do, and the spider would do likewise.  It was an interesting game to watch.  Knowing hunters typically need movement to trigger the hunt, the spider was amazingly still for quite some time. 

 

All my attempts at trying to get Dobby to see the spider came to naught.  To Dobby’s credit, he did eventually spot a movement.  Interestingly, when it saw Dobby’s head turn toward me, the spider chose that moment to make its move. 

 

Unfortunately for the spider, Dobby turned back too quickly.  Then the cat and spider’s chase was on.  The spider won the battle, primarily thanks to the glass table – it was always on the other side of where Dobby was.  It was pretty funny!

 

Of our two cats, Dobby is the better strategist.  He lay himself down by the glass table and was content to wait.  It was near midnight, and this was like noon for him.  So on that note, I went to bed.

 

When my husband woke in the morning, I warned him about sticking his hand in the bowl to grab his wallet – just in case spidey wanted to make a home in there during daylight hours.  It turns out spidey lost the war because, by morning, he was no more found dead on the floor.

 

For the simple reason, things still happen after I’ve written my blog and before I’ve shuffled the cards, I am contemplating writing the day’s events before I deal with the cards for the new day.  Writing at this time will give the card cycle a proper 24-hours to work.

Butterflying Reflective Mikki

Anyway, today’s activities were focused on my website again – this time more about improving the logo’s design.  A comment on the logo’s shape that I agreed with had been troubling me since I created it.  There was just something missing.  Something that would make Reflective Mikki, the figure’s name, look like it was contemplating rather than doing a sit-up.

 

So during the day, I drifted from element to element and decided I would obtain the services of a logo specialist/ professional to help me out around the page.  It was then realising when I started this venture a year ago; I hadn’t clearly identified my requirements for the site.  To some extent, I still don’t, but by going live and posting, I’m discovering my real needs and can now put something together.

 

Another thing I started writing on both the “about me” page or simply reword the text on the “home page”.  I will need to chat with an expert about which avenue is better, one or the other or both.  Nonetheless, I wrote the text for both, and in writing, I discovered what was missing from the logo – a soul!  The glowing soul light overlaid with yin-yang rotated to align with the earth’s axis.

 

So today, I sent off the tweak to the logo to the designers for a quote to adjust it to fit.  But I can tell you I’m so happy the addition of the “soul light” ties in all the elements, and it makes sense of who I am both in the text and the tweak to Reflective Mikki.  So comfortable, even if I am opening my life up in it!  But that’s the whole purpose of the blog and of butterflying, isn’t it?

 

Okay, let’s see what the cards had to say.

The Cards

Cross starts with Butterflying

Firstly, the card of Beyond Illusion a beautiful card.  Today the butterfly overlaying a serene person’s face is attracting me.  It makes me think of transformation and the caterpillar that came before the chrysalis into the butterfly.  Based on my day, I would say it applies.

 

Today’s Influencer card is Courage; this can be read as both influencer and blocker.  It required courage for me to decide to open up in the “about me” area.  Yet, the very lack of courage could have prevented the growth.  Mind you, I haven’t published it yet – one tender flat of the wings at a time.

 

And look, the Harmony card has returned but in the Goal position. According to the Osho Zen Tarot book, my goal is to “follow my heart whatever the stake” (p. 116), which fits with my goal today.  Both with my logo and the new addition to my page.

 

I think from the focus of today, and it has undoubtedly come from the Rebirth of the website. Tick that off as the Distant Past card being accurate for today too.

 

Looking at the Recent Past, again based on what I have written about my day, word Integration sums up what I’ve been trying to accomplish. Talk about spot on so far.

 

I certainly hope Sharing this with people interested in having a nibble or even interested in a more extensive read of this site is what I would like to do.  Just deciding when to share it is going to be a challenge.  Maybe tomorrow.  However, looking ahead at the Hopes and Fears position, timing will be my challenge.

Base

Well, I am certainly feeling more playful with what I write and how I write it.  Yes, the grammar isn’t perfect.  I will try and get better – there are still some mental landmines put in during my school years by well-meaning people that I need to diffuse before I understand grammar completely.

 

Nonetheless, I hope to make the site fun in parts.  If we’re going to do this for a year, a sense of humour is needed.  So my Feelings position (see what I did there) for the site today is that it needs Playfulness.

 

The Other People’s Views position on the emerging butterfly is all part of Experiencing life and growth.  Fingers-crossed; not sure how the logo company will feel about the change in logo design – again.

 

So position nine, Hopes and Fear, is Patience.  Aha.  Patience and I don’t see each other often.  Suffering FOMO (fear of missing out) at times pushes my patience to impatience quickly.

 

Funnily, if I don’t think about waiting, patience is its reward.  The question is, how long do I wait to engage the developer?  I know I would like “right now”.  Developer’s cost money, and I want to make sure that I have enough to cover what I need.  Not much I can do about it right now – tomorrow.

 

Breakthrough is a fitting Outcome card for the day.  The one I’m particularly excited about is the logo one.  Yippee!

 

End Day 006 - Butterflying

Day 005 – Too Much Thinking

5 January 2021

Too much thinking. Day 005. Tabled list: order of appearance. Maturity, Harmony, Morality, No-thingness, The Miser, Mind, Healing, Projections, Comparison, Schizophrenia. Shuffle method was Standard Shuffle

Today, I wrangle with an exercise hangover, and the headache is not from too much thinking! Although, overthinking was a struggle sometimes.

Firstly, yesterday I got out my yoga mat and decided it was time to exercise to maintain flexibility.  I turned on the Nintendo Wii and put in the Fitness First yoga disk.

Today, I had an exercise hangover from the exertion, and the lactic acid in my muscles contributed to a headache.  Even with a couple of headache tablets, the thumping was still there, chastising me for being so thoughtless not to continue yoga as part of my regular exercise regime.

On the whole, I wasn’t feeling well and was keeping my activity to a minimum – basically sitting on the couch feeling sorry for myself.

Let’s see what the cards had to say about my day!

Today's Cards

The Beginning of Too Much Thinking

The first card is the card of Maturity.  The Maturity card refers to being comfortable with your skills.  For me, that’s true because I can get a post onto a website now 🎉.

It’s interesting to see the Harmony in the Influence position.  Harmony influencing Maturity would mean the maturity I have gained comes from a place of peace and ease instead of, say… frustration.

The Goal position is Morality.  Because I am aware of my situation instead of reading for someone else, I will differ from Osho’s interpretation.  Except Osho highlights that this card is about being prim, proper and following what society expects when it constrains us. 

Sometimes I read this card to mean wanting to do things “properly”.  For instance, I would like to edit my website properly rather than winging it.  And as a snow ski instructor said to me, there are two types of skiers those who can survive the mountain and those who can ski it.  His comment was in response to discovering I was an Australian in a ski lesson, and it wasn’t my first lesson.  The first class will teach you how to survive the mountain.  The more you attend classes, the better at skiing you get.

Australians in Switzerland had a reputation for being terrors on the slopes because they did one or two classes and thought that’s all there was to skiing.  Unfortunately, it made them dangerous to others and not very popular or thought of an overthinking anything – skiing wise.

Sometimes Morality can be a good thing.  I want to build my website, and I’d like to be doing it correctly.  Not because I want to conform and be constrained, it’s because I want to be efficient and considerate to others using the mountain.

Still Overthinking

No-thingness appears in the same position as on Day 3.  Today’s events were born out of potential.  Two days ago was Sunday, and when I start an exercise regime, it’s usually started on a Monday.  That’s when I made the decision I had to exercise.

The Recent Past with The Miser in this position may resemble the fact I had previously been stingy with my exercise.  Also, I’m probably too cheap to pay for a gym when my argument is that if I can’t get myself motivated at home, how will a gym be different?

That brings us to Future Energy which has another one of my favourite cards, Mind – not!  Luckily for me, I did not notice this card at the beginning of the day because it usually means mental turmoil.  The Mind card itself is enough to induce confusion.   Today my Mind was possibly simply a reflection of my headache. 

Layout Base of Too Much Thinking

The next card is easy to work out Healing.  Indeed, I felt getting acquainted with the couch was a method of healing.  I could not do much except binge watch something.

Now I’m not sure how to interpret the Projections card.  Based on what I said on day one, Projections is about placing your expectations upon another.  Does it mean I’m projecting onto others?  Or am I feeling the projections of others?  Thinking on it, it’s probably the latter.  The only barometer I have in my situation is me, and therefore, if I am feeling sorry for myself, I expect my husband to do likewise 😏.

The Comparison card in the Hopes & Fears position is a caution against comparing myself and others.  For the last couple of days, I have progressed quite nicely with my knowledge and, in the background, some future content.  The fear when seeing a “lack” of progress is that I will give up on it.

Comparison gives me pause and makes me recite my current mantra, “I am not them, and they are not me, I need to let each of us be free”.  “Free” meaning free to each be ourselves without harsh judgment.  Just because I can guess what someone might be thinking doesn’t mean the person will act upon it.  Like Agatha Christie’s, Hercule Poirot commented that it is okay to kick a table when you are angry with someone, but it is not the same as kicking the person.

The Outcome

Anyway, the Schizophrenia card as the Outcome indicates being at war between a rock and a hard place.  Osho’s suggestion for overcoming the difficulty is to let go of both things at once.  I’m writing this at 11:00 PM, and the cards dealt at 8:00 AM.  The difference between dealing and writing allowed for a headache to form, and to continue writing is a challenge for me.

After five minutes of trying, it became apparent that I was accomplishing nothing on the website, and the thinking was delaying my headache from getting better.  Any thought seemed to make concentration all the more challenging.  Welcome to Osho’s definition of Schizophrenia.

Did I mention I was stubborn?  Well, I can be.  I persisted a little longer to try and do both, but the third option of self-pity won out.  A good thing, too, because I would have hated to miss writing this post.

Overthinking the Summary

Harmony allows Maturity around the growth that seemed so painful at first.  However, the Goal of Morality, doing things correctly, has been set from a past full of potential (No-thingness) to the tight constraints of The Miser putting limits on growth.  Breaking free will confuse the Mind.

Confusion is the beginning of new growth and Healing.  Taking time to heal is necessary.  Others’ Views are Projections of themselves or perhaps placing unrealistic interpretations on the questioner. 

The fear borne of Comparison can be limiting, but Comparison can be helpful if it is with oneself and one’s personal growth.

Schizophrenia holds the balance of two unfavourable options keeping both causes a split in loyalties.  The solution to the split is to follow neither. 

Day 004 – Compromise is a Bitter Pill (edited)

4 January 2021

Day 004. Celtic Cross Layout: 1 is Now Traveling. 2 is Influence Ordinariness. 3 is Goal Completion. 4 is Distant Past The Miser. 5 is Recent Past The Dream. 6 is Future Energy Participation. 7 is Feelings or Immediate Future Going with the Flow. 8 is Others' Views Inner Voice. 9 is Hope & Fears The Source. 10 is Outcome Compromise
Tabled list position number, description and daily card:1 is Now,Traveling.2 is Influence,Ordinariness.3 is Goal,Completion.4 is Distant Past,The Miser.5 is Recent Past,The Dream.6 is Future Energy,Participation.7 is Feelings,Going with the Flow.8 is Others’ views,Inner Voice.9 is Hopes & Fears,The Source.10 is Outcome,Compromise.

When a ten-year-old forgets to pack a charger for his favourite game device.  His options are few, and he’s taught the lesson that compromise is a bitter pill.

Not much to say at the moment; my day felt productive, although there isn’t much to show for it, more like working on the foundations.  My advancement concerning website development has stalled as I have a functioning post template.  

Today’s apologies extend to you because the site is a little challenging to get around, and there isn’t a lot of information filling areas of the site.  I will get there – I promise :).

Before we progress, however, I’d like to explain how I shuffle.  After I lay out the cards and take the photo, I gather the cards and put each one back into the deck separately.  The theory is that if the cards show up together or close to one another, it’s shuffling results, not the product of them having to have been together when they started.

Compromise Context

Compromise is the word of the day, it’s in the Outcome position, and I don’t like it. My dilemma was getting a charger for my nephew and worrying about COVID-19 implications while trying to send the parcel.  I needed to negotiate with a ten-year-old; he’d left the charger to the Nintendo Switch at our place. 

His choice was to wait for the charger, buy a new charger (which his mother wasn’t having any of because she wanted to teach him about consequences) or play another device until the charger arrives.  My nephew wanted to convince my sister to buy a replacement charger.  The Compromise inevitably was he would play with another device until the charger came. 

On the last day of my nephew’s visit, his mother put him in charge of making sure the electronic equipment he wanted back home was packed.  Ironically, too busy playing on the Switch, he neglected to pack it.    

Sending the charger was my mission today 🤔.  On the other hand, my nephew had to compromise on the electronic gadget on which he played.  It was a bitter pill for him to swallow, but hopefully, he learnt something.  Insult to injury, he was unable to blame anyone but himself.  Once my nephew swallowed the compromise pill, he was okay with it (not that he had a choice).

That said, let’s get-go!

Cross leading to Compromise

The first card of the day in the Now position was Traveling.  The Osho Zen interpretation of the Traveling card is about the journey, not about the destination.  Thinking back on the day, it was very much about enjoying developing material for the layouts and finding out how to record the back-end writing.  However, I have a destination, which is building something for you, dear reader, to view.  However, there is more to do and much more to learn.  The journey of my nephew’s charger’s runs parallel to my own.  His charger is ready to travel.

The second card in the Influence position was Ordinariness.  There were some things I needed to do at the post office.  The post office situated amongst shops, and I took the liberty of moseying through some of the shops at a leisurely pace and simply enjoyed doing everyday stuff.   

My sole focus was to post a “gift” for my nephew, which due to COVID-19, I was unable to give him personally.  Since this was something I wanted to get done, it counts as a goal.  It aligns with the card of Completion in position three. On the parallel path of the website development, I wanted to get some aspects finalised, too.

From the Past to the Future

Position four, being the Distant Past, has the card of The MiserThe Miser, I suspect, might be how I would typically be when it comes to the post office; get in, post the parcel, and go home.  If needed, there might even be a quick dash to the supermarket to pick up groceries.  So, The Miser who robs people of time or is very stingy with money spurned the opposite today.  Often we can outgrow what was in the Distant Past, showing that we have grown.

The Recent Past has The Dream’s card, possibly someone misreading a situation by placing romantic, trusting, or unrealistic notions upon it. I confess I did do this—romantic ideas of completing sections of work miraculously.  In my nephew’s case, it was him trusting that his mother would pick up the Switch charger as part of her packing up (we know how that went). 

The Future Energy position shows Participation, which is all about enjoying life.  It’s about noticing the beauty in which you exist; this is what the goal of Ordinariness suggests, being a part of existence rather than separate from it.  Time to not be a spectator but a participant. In my case, it was getting stuck into the website; in my nephew’s, it was about participating in the travel experience and ensuring items he cared about got packed.

Base of Compromise

So, what are my Feelings on the issue?  Going with the Flow is a beautiful continuation of the current state (Traveling) and links beautifully with the Participation of Future Energy card.  There’s not much more to say on this position.  I am not fighting the stream for my website, and my nephew is accepting he cannot play the Switch.

Other People’s Views in position eight appears congruent with the Goal card, too. I’m viewed as listening to my Inner Voice. I love this idea, although I know it is a fleeting state like everything. It’s hard to maintain listening to your Inner Voice

Position nine and its card reflects the inner Hopes and Fears; the card is The Source.  The Source is about finding your core and doing what you need to do. It might be prudent to remember the advice in the Traveling card of enjoying the journey rather than focussing on the result. My fear is of the pain in knowing that the moment of connection with The Source is temporary.

Finally, the tenth card and Outcome position has the card of Compromise.  I’ll fess up; I don’t like this card.  I’m not sure how a Compromise can occur when you’re Going with the Flow or participating in life and enjoying each moment of life.  If I take the situation back to the Now, perhaps a compromise needs to set a plan and provide discipline to meet it.  Penalty, in this case, being contrary to Going with the Flow.

Layout Summary Reading

Travelling with myself aided by Ordinariness of enjoying the journey, Completion occurs through Participation.  I’ve learnt from The Miser from a Distant Past and overcame the unrealistic notions of The Dream.  The Dream is an ethereal construct designed to distract from the longing in the Now for a future made of rose-coloured glasses. 

Because listening to an Inner Voice reflects in the Going with the Flow, there is the hope of connecting to one’s source and connecting to the soul, The Source. However, all is not rosy, and a Compromise may happen to ensure progress continues.

Day 003 – Full of Possibilities

3 January 2021

Celtic Cross Layout of daily cards.1 is Now, card is Ice-olation.2 is Influence, card is Silence.3 is Goal, card is Ordinariness.4 is Distant Past, card is Nothingness.5 is Recent Past, card is Totality.6 is Future Energy, card is Completion.7 is Feelings, card is Compromise.8 is Others’ views, card is Sorrow.9 is Hopes & Fears, card is We are the World.10 is Outcome, card is Possibilities.
Tabled list:position number,description,and daily card.1 is Now, card is Ice-olation.2 is Influence, card is Silence.3 is Goal, card is Ordinariness.4 is Distant Past, card is No-thingness.5 is Recent Past, card is Totality.6 is Future Energy, card is Completion.7 is Feelings, card is Compromise.8 is Others’ views, card is Sorrow.9 is Hopes & Fears, card is We are the World.10 is Outcome, card is Possibilities.Shuffle Method used was Standard Shuffle.

If you were wondering whether things were looking up on how I post stuff on the site, they are.  I learnt how to remove the duplicate headings I was encountering on Days one and two.  Fortunately, I was able to update them without deleting the page – which is a bonus.  Also, things are looking a little less scary around the website today.

Now into the cards! 

The first card, in the Now, is the card of Ice-olation.  Osho typically identifies this as a card where one feels alone due to pushing others away and not accepting help. 

At other times, it had appeared to me when I had felt no one amongst family, friends or co-workers could understand what I am going through.  In part because I didn’t want to burden them, and in certain circumstances, I chose to suffer alone. 

Today, I started with feeling like I didn’t want to burden people with my website.  Little did I know that things were ticking away happily and sorting themselves out in the back of my mind.  This processing of ideas in the background, I would attribute to the Silence I was feeling around how to progress a situation that I thought was a dead end. 

So, I set about my day and accompanied my husband to buy a new pair of work shoes.  Buying shoes is what the Ordinariness card symbolised in the Goal or crowning position.  It was something ordinary that I enjoyed.  Although I dreaded the thought of shopping around for hours to find the right shoes, it turned into something swift, with the shoes also being on a massive discount as a result of the January sales. 

I also decided to purchase a COVID-19 mask to have on hand for those times I might wind up in circumstances where social distancing is a bit more challenging to maintain.

The No-thingness card, which sits blankly in black, represents potential.  Like an empty glass awaiting fulfilment, a blank canvas awaiting the artist’s creativity, it’s the ebb-tide or the moment between the in-breath and the out-breath.  Where the in-breath has finished, but the out-breath hasn’t quite started yet.  It’s just that moment of waiting – potential. 

It is pretty beautiful, and as I type about Nothingness and thinking back on what I wrote above about my dead-end, it was probably No-thingness at work. 

The position of the Recent Past has the card of Totality.  The Totality card is about that moment when you completely surrender.  It is the moment when the tide begins to turn, and the out-breath starts; it’s the moment of letting go completely. 

There is no progress without risk, and then letting go is the risk.  The out-breath is a risk that there might not be another in-breath, but we surrender because we cannot stay in a moment forever (even if we can forever live in the moment!). After we returned from shoe shopping, I sat and experimented continually on my website and risked losing everything.

Stupidly, I hadn’t backed it up beforehand mainly because I didn’t think I would experiment too much; but like pulling on a thread of an idea, everything started to unravel – in a good way.  The notion upon idea was triggering solution after solution; what’s more, it was working.  I didn’t want to stop working on learning something else because I would get distracted and lose my train of thought.   Erh… you mean like backups.  They’re tomorrow’s problem :).

From the Recent Past, we move to Future Energy sitting to the left-hand side of the question.  Today’s card is the card of Completion. This card nicely completes the metaphor of the out-breath.  The out-breath reaches its maximum point.  The card shows a person’s face made up of jigsaw pieces, with the final item put in place.  It’s the moment of exhalation when you’ve been waiting to exhale.

The next card starts with what I usually perceive as the inner strip. In my view, it deals less with the physical and more with the emotional aspects of the situation.  This strip begins with position seven on how the questioner feels about the question.

Sitting above the seven is position eight and seeks to identify how others view the questioner or the questioner’s situation about the questioner.

The ninth card, positioned above the eighth, aims to surface the questioner’s hopes and fears on the question.  Finally, directly above position nine is the tenth card, which is possible, given the other elements make sense.

Today’s position seven has the card of Compromise.  Compromise in the Osho deck means a half-half situation.  It’s when the final score of a game-ending in a draw.  It’s a non-plus or stalemate situation.  It’s better than a loss, but it’s not a proper win because each party has lost something in the deal.

Indeed, although I made progress concerning the website and the creative activities in the background, there are elements that I’ve sacrificed to keep momentum.  There’s also a little bit of sleep surrendered – but with improvement comes rest.  So, yes. I do feel that my isolation has triggered some personal sacrifices.  Talking about my life on the internet also feels a little scary.

Position eight has the card of Sorrow seems to indicate that my sacrifice isn’t going unnoticed.  The card shows Buddha’s trusted companion Ananda crying on the first day of the year.  It is the only day Ananda allows himself to weep for the people who haven’t reached enlightenment yet. 

Perhaps my husband, who has witnessed my rants around the house, has noticed sorrow – maybe he’s feeling like Ananda because I hadn’t reached enlightenment yet.   

Moving to position nine and the card of We are the World.  I hope everything would come together just like I wanted.  That’s pretty much what the Completion card shows with the last piece put into place.  With the final element in place, addressing the next hurdle can be tackled.  I’ve been working on developing a dynamic stats page, a media library and getting the All Posts page up, not to mention the layout and instruction PowerPoints.  Oh… one step at a time!

That leaves the final position, position ten, located directly above position nine.  Most times, I’ll be able to identify whether things have panned out, given that the photo of the layout happens at the beginning of the day, and I write about my day and the cards at the end of the day. 

The Outcome position has Possibilities.  Based on today’s progress, I feel things have indeed fallen into place – not everything, but more than I thought possible a mere fifteen hours ago.

 

Layout Summary:

Grounded in the Distant Past, No-thingness spurned a self-imposed Ice-olation blanketed by Silence. In reaching for and embracing Ordinariness, Totality arises and builds the foundation for Completion

Completion with Compromise that others felt as Sorrow not realising the inner hopes and fears were about harmonising in We are the World.  Without the Compromise, Completion of Possibilities would not be possible.

Day 002 – Where The Master Sits

Saturday, 2 January 2021

Celtic Cross Layout of daily cards.1 is Now, card is The Master.2 is Influence, card is Past Lives.3 is Goal, card is The Rebel.4 is Distant Past, card is Moment to Moment.5 is Recent Past, card is Possibilities.6 is Future Energy, card is Breakthrough.7 is Feelings, card is Rebirth.8 is Others’ views, card is Innocence.9 is Hopes & Fears, card is Morality.10 is Outcome, card is The Miser.
Tabled list position number,description and daily card:1 is Now,The Master.2 is Influence,Past Lives.3 is Goal,The Rebel.4 is Distant Past,Moment to Moment.5 is Recent Past,Possibilities.6 is Future Energy,Breakthrough.7 is Feelings,Rebirth.8 is Others’ views,Innocence.9 is Hopes & Fears,Morality.10 is Outcome,The Miser.

Day two, and we’re off to a great start.  We can see that some cards have moved around from yesterday, and new cards have entered the day.  All to be expected since, at some point, I’m hoping all the cards to appear.  So far, all my thoughts are on getting the website moving, and I have today discovered the way I would like the site to look.  Because of my basic skills, I’m working in PowerPoint to get the look I want and hopefully will be able to present that to a developer to build.

The Master in the Now position or position one is quite interesting.  However, I have felt today has just been.  Any enlightenment prompted by Past Lives was also hindered by them.  Now, what does this mean?  First, although I believe reincarnation is a thing, I also think we can exit the reincarnation cycle if we follow our intuition.

However, one life has multiple lives within it.  We change so much that sometimes we look back on our very existence to find the person we once were is almost unrecognisable to who we are now – shackled by fears borne of past experiences but enlightened by the positive ones too.  

For this site, this is what I mean when I refer to “past lives”.  Fittingly, a quote from Osho, which I loved before I found the banner goes like this: “One can live this same ordinary life in such an exquisite, extraordinary way that it becomes sacred, but there is no other life than this.  You have to learn the art of transforming this very ordinary life into something beautiful”.

In this deck, The Rebel card represents breaking away from enforced societal norms.  Each person grows up with differing expectations, and therefore something radical to one person is commonplace to another.

My aim associated with the Goal position is to break away from my traditional upbringing.  Because I come from a conventional project manager background, my schooling teaches me to understand the look of the end product.  New project management is that it’s iterative.  Hence, start with something and then improve upon that as you go along.

You may have noticed that The Rebel card has moved from yesterday’s “Future Energy” position to become today’s “Goal” position.  If I were reading this for someone else, I would say the questioner is in the process of breaking away from some societal constraints and, while breaking them, is aiming to break free of some more.

The Moment to Moment card that sat in the recent past yesterday has today moved to the distant past.  Unsurprisingly predictable (except this is Tarot – so, it is surprisingly surprising 😁.  Also, the Possibilities card has moved from the “Now” position to the “Recent Past” position.  It is suggesting, the possibilities were present and acted upon to some extent.  Again, this appears to be a logical way for the cards to move.  Sceptically, you might argue that it was not a good shuffle.  From a probability standpoint, it was always a likely outcome.

The Future Energy position has the Breakthrough card, which yesterday acted as an accelerator to Possibilities while simultaneously putting the brakes on others.  It now looks like the energy surrounding the Breakthrough is going to continue.  On day one of the 365 days of Tarot, I had a breakthrough in website development.  This Breakthrough motivated me to finalise where I want to go with my home page and adjust my existing logo, but there’s still a little way to go before I can publish the new logo (let alone the old one).

The Breakthrough is driving a Rebirth in my enthusiasm to get things moving along more quickly.  Others probably see the attempts I’m making at launching like I’m unexposed to the new world of web development and posting.  And you know, you/ they’d be right!

My inner fear is Morality, with all its constraints, will inhibit The Rebel in his trying to break free of tight bonds.  Trying to identify which bonds to escape and their respective costs always worries me a little.  On the other hand, I hope that I stay within the confines of acceptable – if not expected.

Now, The Miser card has moved from the Distant Past position yesterday to the Outcome position today.  If this were a separate standalone reading, I would be tempted not to link the two or the respective progress.  Now my faith in “me”, knowing on a subliminal level what I’m up to, leads to another interpretation.  

Yesterday, I mentioned looking to hire a web developer and had projected all my fantasies of someone just taking over development like they worked for me and knew what I wanted intuitively.  This projection wasn’t reality.  I had projected my hopes onto a poor unsuspecting innocent.  Because I do not want to spend money on yet another web developer, The Miser card would certainly be appropriate.

Forewarned (and because I dislike The Miser card) could prove motivation for me to do the complete opposite.  Hmmm.

Summary

No longer weighed down by Past Lives, The Master has become The Rebel.  The Rebel previously embraced Possibilities by accepting and moving from Moment to Moment that drifts to the past.  A Breakthrough continues to inspire Rebirth into Innocence for all to see.  The shackles of Morality bind while the inner spirit wishes to be free, and yet The Miser comes from Morality and its sensible confines.

Day 001 – The Transformation Begins

1 January 2021

Celtic Cross Layout of daily cards.1 is Now, card is Possibilities.2 is Influence, card is Breakthrough.3 is Goal, card is Past Lives.4 is Distant Past, card is The Miser.5 is Recent Past, card is Moment to Moment.6 is Future Energy, card is The Rebel.7 is Feelings, card is Projections.8 is Others’ views, card is Awareness.9 is Hopes & Fears, card is Flowering.10 is Outcome, card is Transformation.
Tabled list position number,description and daily card:1 is Now,Possibilities.2 is Influence,Breakthrough.3 is Goal,Past Lives.4 is Distant Past,The Miser.5 is Recent Past,Moment to Moment.6 is Future Energy,The Rebel.7 is Feelings,Projections.8 is Others’ views,Awareness.9 is Hopes & Fears,Flowering.10 is Outcome,Transformation.

Welcome to day one of my experiment with tarot cards.  It’s exhilarating for me and the beginning of my Transformation to becoming a blogger. 

Transformation Context

Before I go any further, please forgive the slightly crude nature of the layout.  I am not a web developer no matter how much I try to wish myself into being one (in the beginning, there were duplicate headings for this post? That’s right; I didn’t know how to follow a simple template to get rid of them… got there by Day 003!  I added this comment retrospectively – ooh, trippy time travel 🙂). 

My bank account and patience have both taken hard knocks on getting to this point.  Perhaps, The Miser card set in the distant past position demonstrates that I’ve had to be frugal and thrifty with both – and maybe a tad stubborn :).

My aspirations often overtake my skill level, and perhaps the Projections card is fitting to tell that story.  Projections are when you put onto someone or something else what you wish to be accurate or what you think they are feeling by using yourself as the barometer.  While at times this is useful, the Projections card is a reminder that there are some circumstances where this might be happening.

For instance, today, I began my journey for another web developer.  Based on the person’s website and photo, I immediately decided I liked her because I feel she might get me.  The Projections card recommended that I step back and check my interpretation.

Projections and Transformation

Perhaps because of COVID-19, I’ve been doing a bit of doomscrolling, especially around the US election – for your information, I live in South-East Queensland, Australia. So, when I see US state initials, I’m now more familiar with their abbreviated form.  Looking at the state, I realised that they might have differing political views from mine.  More than acceptable by me, except it would’ve been awkward on the person to burst my bubble or worse, that pregnant pause when you realise that things are not as expected :).

My father used to project his views onto me, and it was pretty tricky to correct his assumptions sometimes because I felt how much he wanted to have that connection with me.  Alas, I have the opportunity to assess myself to find out if that’s what I was doing.  Oh yeah, I was – and I haven’t even spoken to the person yet.

That said, this website is starting and will improve over the year.  After all, that’s what the journey is about.

So, today is day one of the overall plan to capture 365 days of tarot cards.

Layout Summary

(Apologies that this is in the third person, it’s me reading to me.  I treat this as a separate reading I can become slightly more objective)

New Possibilities are supported with a Breakthrough from Past Lives, leaving The Miser in the past. 

Only by having moved from Moment to Moment.  Does each step lead securely along your path into your future breakthrough? 

Be wary of Projections of what you hope of others and care not to misrepresent yourself to encourage their projection.

Others believe you are becoming aware (Awareness) of yourself in a new way regarding your new enterprise. 

Yet you fear your growth (Flowering) while simultaneously wishing it was so.

Finally, Transformation occurs, and it will be irreversible – you have figuratively jumped off a ledge into the unknown, and your Transformation begins in earnest. 

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