Thursday, 7October 2021
Say No Context
Today, I heard two songs that got me thinking, Nenah Cherry’s Heart and Dolly Parton’s Joelene. Both tunes are full of passion about how the other woman is threatening to take away their man. These songs don’t credit men with any volition of their own. Surely men are empowered to say no, too.
Or are these songs saying men are susceptible? Then, why would you be with someone so gullible? Isn’t there a line in the Lord’s Prayer asking us not to be led into temptation, and isn’t the whole point of that line to encourage our convictions and loyalties?
Quite simply, temptation is there to resist. By the way, I’m not very good at it myself; in the words of Oscar Wilde, “I can resist anything except temptation”. Does it hark back to Adam and Eve’s apple scenario? In that scenario, is it saying Adam/ men are innately the weaker sex because he/ they can’t resist temptation from his/ their rib?
It’s a fundamentally flawed concept if men are unable to say ‘no’? Are they ‘spoilt’ brats? Or is it generation upon generation giving leeway to boys what they want? In my grandmothers’ generation – and my mother’s – men were fawned over. My mother doted on most I dated.
In relatively recent times, a person I know when, in the middle east, was part of a multi-rape trial. Her perception was the innocent young woman displayed her body like she was walking through London rather than the middle east. The young woman was unaware of the cultural nuances, thereby “courting trouble”.
My acquaintance’s view was, men were powerless to say no? Yet so many men had! I can’t begin to write how I disagree with the perspective. Because once I start, I’d be writing all night.
Women's Magazines
On the contrary, men can say no and often do but don’t traditionally have no told to them. There are some aspects of society; I’m talking women’s magazines that write stories about various women being ‘homewreckers’ or taking another woman’s man. Really?
Firstly, a person should not be a possession of someone else. Any engagement or co-existence should be mutual, in my humble opinion. Secondly, doesn’t the man doesn’t have a say? What bewitching beguilement do these women possess to have such power?
My ex-husband, in a heated argument I told, cruelly baited him to cheat on me. Out of spite, he went to take me up on the offer, but he couldn’t go through with it in the end. The same was true for Anton, a previous work colleague. He had made plans to cheat on his wife. He changed his mind at the last minute when he realised how much he loved his wife and didn’t want to hurt or lose her. He simply had to say no.
In both these cases, the man was not a mere puppet, nor was he a slave to his physical urges both understood consequences? I love the saying, ‘it takes two to tango’ because it reminds me that men or the other party involved can say no too, even if it is challenging.
Today's Cards
The Cards - Say No Analysis
Carryover Cards
No cards carried over from yesterday.
Cross
The Distant Past’s Friendliness, I’m going to assume is a previous love (and I still enjoy) of these songs, has given rise to Recent Past’s Stress.
My Goal today was to discuss Possibilities while playfully and skilfully writing tactfully on this topic akin to serious Politics. The change comes from the influence of a Breakthrough that, unless the go-between party is drugged, it takes two to tango.
Alas, Ripeness in Future Energy suggests it’s the right time for me to broach the subject and talk about men also having the ability to say no.
Base
The Breakthrough has been illuminating, and my Feelings are that I’m undergoing a Transformation. I know I’ve now seen a perspective in myself that I won’t be able to “unsee”.
Others’ Views are that my perception is romanticised by The Dream’s appearance – not sure how that works.
In the meantime, Hopes & Fears has Harmony. I’m hoping not to destroy any Harmony I’ve established with my followers and fear the converse is true.
Finally, however, the Outcome for me is Suppression. Can I be true that I’m still suppressing something on the topic of men saying no?
References
- Osho, Osho Zen Tarot – The Transcendental Game of Zen, St Martin’s Press, ISBN 0-312-11733-7
- Tarot Layouts per month
SEO – It’s funny how songs can prompt a breakthrough today. It was a couple of songs & a conversation with an acquaintance on how men can say no too
