Day: 14 Sep 2021

Day 258 – Vanity Kicks back Laughing

Wednesday, 15 September 2021

Day 258. Vanity's Kick. Cards in order of appearance: Rebirth, Projections, Healing, Moment to Moment, Patience, Suppression, Silence, The Master, Understanding, Going with the Flow, Standard Shuffle

Vanity's Kick Context

This morning I had to have a chuckle at myself.  After my meditation, I went to the bathroom, had a look at my figure side on and front on and felt good about me and my “perceived weight loss”.  On the high, I smugly sought out my loose-fitting pants to wear to work.  Well, smugness and vanity took a Bugatti Veyron, at full speed, out the door and exited the building.

Alas, the tight-fitting loose clothing revelation saddened me.   Especially since I thought I had resisted some of yesterday’s (Day 257) temptations.  The Dream card sitting in the Outcome position has reverted to reality.

What did I really expect?  One day of resisting temptation was not going to make that much difference at my age.  Gone are the days when I could lose three kilos overnight by being good one day.  Oh, well.  Assuredly, it was a wake-up call.  Luckily, I was able to laugh at my misconception and apparently, laughing at yourself is beneficial.

Today's Cards

Day 258. Vanity's Kick. Cards in order of appearance: Rebirth, Projections, Healing, Moment to Moment, Patience, Suppression, Silence, The Master, Understanding, Going with the Flow, Standard Shuffle

The Cards - Vanity's Kick Analysis

Carryover Cards

One card carried over from yesterday; Moment to Moment moved from Now to Distant Past.

Cross

No surprises as to where Moment to Moment in the Distant Past came from, in this instance (yesterday).  Yesterday I exercised Patience (Recent Past) with my weight control, and today I expected results.  It’s really like going out to the garden to pull up seedlings to see if they have roots yet.

Today’s Goal was Healing.  Being able to laugh at me and shrug off vanity when it struck was a new sensation.  Not that I hadn’t laughed at it before, it was more spontaneous this time.

Projections as the influence on Rebirth is that I was most likely using long experience memories to measure the Now.  And it looks like I’m going to retreat into my shell if the Suppression card in Future Energy is any indicator.

Base

Where the Future Energy has Suppression, my Feelings are of SilenceSilence is self-reflection for me.  Currently, I’m quiet in myself.

Others’ Views of me are as The Master.  Others see me as detached from the emotion but acknowledging it at the same time.  Ah, if only it were all true.

Hopes & Fears has the card of Understanding.  Of course, I hope to understand my situation, but there’s always the fear that I will not do anything about it.

Once again, we reach the Outcome position, and like Moment to Moment, Going with the Flow is simply accepting where one is going without resistance.

References

  1. Osho, Osho Zen Tarot – The Transcendental Game of Zen, St Martin’s Press, ISBN 0-312-11733-7
  2. Tarot Layouts per month

SEO – I felt good after resisting yesterday’s temptations to eat comfort food constantly.  Only to laugh at donning “loose” clothing.

End Day 258

Day 257 – Comfort Eating Struggle

Tuesday, 14 September 2021

Day 257. Comfort Eating. Cards in order of appearance: Moment to Moment, Schizophrenia, Fighting, Abundance, The Burden, Sharing, The Rebel, Playfulness, Change, The Dream, Deck pile shuffle

Comfort Eating Context

Today all I wanted to do was eat.  As a comfort eater, I fall into a vicious cycle of driving full speed to a traffic light, then slamming on the brakes and then a slow take off until I’m not concentrating on eating again and I’m at full speed again.  The strange thing is that a part of me knows why I want to eat; I just don’t want to face it.  Hence, the reason for comfort eating.  

Previously, I’d looked into the Ayurvedic food principles.  In Bell Bragg and Simon’s The Ayurvedic Cookbook, they list twelve guidelines.  Principle ten recommends we “experience all six tastes at every meal”.  Pursuantly, the conclusion of the principle is, “If all six are represented at each meal, it will be nutritionally balanced and you will feel satisfied after eating it” (p. 20).  The six tastes are: sweet, sour, salty, pungent, bitter and astringent (p. 20).

After reading the book, I tried Ayurvedic principles, and it did seem to work for a few weeks.  Being a sugar addict where sugar is my comfort food go to, my urges for sweet stopped.  However, it’s the kind of thing your family needs to be on board with too.  Of course, you can’t make other people change. All you can do is weather the storm of family traditions and forge some new ones.

Sadly, I’m still working on my kryptonite, but I am subtly changing.  Maybe I’ll try some of the Ayurvedic principles again and build on one or two. Then I might be able to break the comfort eating cycle.

Today's Cards

Day 257. Comfort Eating. Cards in order of appearance: Moment to Moment, Schizophrenia, Fighting, Abundance, The Burden, Sharing, The Rebel, Playfulness, Change, The Dream, Deck pile shuffle

The Cards - Comfort Eating Analysis

Carryover Cards

Three cards carried over from yesterday; Moment to Moment moved from Others’ Views to Now, Fighting remained in Goal, Abundance remained in Distant Past.

Cross

Firstly, I’m unsure where, to begin with, the Adventure card in the Distant Past since we’re talking about comfort eating.  What is sure is that whenever I encounter certain forms of stress and it becomes The Burden, like in the Recent Past, I eat.

Secondly, in the Now, I’m influenced by the duality of mind illustrated by the Schizophrenia card.  The constant struggle within the cycle and trying to break it means that ultimately, I’ve just got to let both go and surrender, so I travel from Moment to Moment.

Then my solution might be Sharing my food and my predicament.  Maybe in Sharing my Goal, I can stop Fighting and being on edge, which begins the cycle.

Base

When it comes to my Feelings, The Rebel being self-assured and confident in a new approach.  Maybe, I just need to stop worrying about it?

Pleasantly, Others’ Views are of Playfulness.  In looking up the Osho book, it says, “the moment you start seeing life as non-serious, a playfulness, all the burden on you hear disappears” (p. 55).  How wonderful!

Hopes & Fears tells a story of Change, particularly the fear of changing what I do around comfort eating.  Change prompts all sorts of questions; will I be a different person?  How would I be received if I changed my appearance?  To my family?  Or my friends? 

Changing yourself shifts the current status quo.  In a family of thin, people the fatter may have received a specific type of attention.  If then, they become slim that attention shifts and then it’s a matter of learning to adjust to the new energy.  The unknown brings with it fear.

On the other hand, is hope. It’s the longing to change, become the ideal you have in your mind and be happy with it.

Finally, we arrive at the Outcome and its card of The Dream.  As I’ve discussed many times, The Dream is the romanticised view of a situation and is unrealistic or wilfully ignorant of the situation.  Oh, fiddlesticks! Alas, it looks like comfort eating will remain a challenge 😟

References

  1. Osho, Osho Zen Tarot – The Transcendental Game of Zen, St Martin’s Press, ISBN 0-312-11733-7
  2. Tarot Layouts per month

SEO – Comfort eating dominated my thoughts today. The more I fought the urges to stuff sweets into my mouth, the harder it got to resist.

End Day 257
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